Heartrending sorrow

I’m trying to spend each day with a smile. Even I’m tired, at least in front of Hajime, I’m trying to keep a smile.

The things which happening to me sometime makes me feel like “Is this real?” The reality is too hard for me,,,
Hajime used to laugh right next to me but now he only can spend on a bed. I just can’t bear to face the truth. If I do, I probably collapse in tears.

I’m always facing with this kind of thoughts lately.

Everyone is spending a warm holidays with their families. I’m feeling like I’m only one get left behind. Within a silence, tears just drop from me.

Well,,, of course our family is blessed and happy. We are all together at home now.

I want to be with Hajime forever.
I want to share my heart with Hajime and my family.
Probably having this kind of thoughts itself is blessing.

Recently I wrote about Yuki. Yuki like to play with her dolls.
She is playing with her dolls and says that her dolls are sick and their hands and legs don't move.
Probably, her worry to Hajime is reflecting to her play.
Right now, her thought to Hajime is getting even strong.

I pray for God. Dear God, be with Yuki and heal her worry.
Please be with our family and give us strength.

And of course, all the best wishes to Santa too.


(Translated by HM)