On Hajime's Shoulders

I don't know what's wrong with me lately, but I start to cry just by looking at Hajime's face.  (I think my husband is the same...)
Hajime is really fighting. It is so painful to watch.

The past few days, after the nurse goes home, I've been putting my face next to Hajime's and crying.  But I can't share my feelings with anyone.  I would like someone to just listen to me, but it's very hard.

The only thing that Hajime can do is watch TV...
When I ask him, "Is it fun watching TV?" he answers no.
I wonder what is fun...I don't think he wants to use the computer.

We are making plans to go to Disneyland this month or next month.
If anyone can join us, please come with him.
It would make me happy if Hajime got excited about just getting in to Disneyland.

But we have to get rid of his infection first!

Up close, Hajime looks good.
But, the truth is, he is in a very difficult situation.

The most important thing now is his battle against the infection.

The use of antibiotics in pain management.  That is a very difficult problem.
The infection has not cleared up yet...which makes me wonder if he has already built up a resistance.
He came down with this current fever just two days after he finished his antibiotics.
He still gets a fever at night and he has had a light green runny nose since yesterday.
I think it's a cold, but I worry.

I hear that the reason for the high death rate among ALS patients is infections.
Because of Hajime's current resistance level,  we've been told to watch if his fever goes above 99 degrees F (37.22 C).  We must also watch for infections of his bedsores.

I am feeling very anxious about what to do for his current infection.


(translated by MS)